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best 9ja jokes

  1. Pregnant
    Maid.
    Our daughter
    is pregnant!
    That’s her
    problem.
    Neighbors are
    talking!
    It is their
    problem!
    I am nervous.
    It is your
    problem.

- They are
sure it is
yours!
That’s my
problem!
2. Midnight.
The man
comes too
late and
knocks the
door. His wife
says:
- Go back
from where
you have just
come.
- I will jump
into a pool.
- Whatever.
Kill yourself.
The man
throws a
stone into
the water.
The wife runs
out of the
house to
help, while
the man is
carefully
comes inside
and locks the
door. The
woman is in
shock:
- Let me in or
I will shout!
- Oh, and you
will explain all
the neighbors
where you
have come
from in your
pants and bra
in the
midnight.
3. Three
Thieves.
Three
criminals are
in the court
for getting
their
punishment.
The judge
says: I will
give it
corresponding
to the
number of
things you
have stolen.
The first man
received just
a year for a
can of
sardine. The
second one
got 30 years
for taking a
tray of eggs.
Akpos
appeared to
be the least
lucky, as he
took a bag of
rice…
4. At the
Border.
A man
crosses the
border on the
bicycle. The
officer on the
Custom asks:
- What are
you carrying?
- Just rice.
The officer
spent much
time checking
and found
nothing but
rice. The
second time
the situation
repeated.
- What are
you caring?
- Rice.
Proper
examinations
were made in
vain again.
Once the
officer met
that man in
the bar, he
asked:
- Tell me in
secret, what
are you
smuggling?
- Bicycles.
5. Who killed
Abel.
A policeman is
reading a
Bible. Akpos
comes to him
and asks:
-Who killed
Abel?
-Ask the one
in charge of
murder cases!
– shouts the
officer.
6. First
Class.
Akpos comes
home and
tells his
father:
- I have got
the highest
points at
school today!
The father
was very
happy and
spent all his
money to
celebrate it.
But when
they came
home the dad
saw the real
marks of his
son.
- What does it
suppose to
mean?!
- April Fool’s
Day!
7. Our
Problem.
The Akpos
comes home
from his
office very
upset.
- What
happened?
- I have some
problems in
my office.
- All the
problems are
ours!
- So, then a
secretary in
our office is
pregnant for
us.
The wife
fainted.
8.
Attractive.
Darling.
Says the
wife, – I’m
already 55,
but one of
your friends
thinks I am
very
beautiful.
The man
answers: I am
sure it is
Brad. But
how did you
know? – asks
the woman in
astonishment.
And gets the
reply: He
always deals
in leftovers…
9. Cemetery.
A man writes
on the forum:
Our politicians
go to Europe
for education,
to Paris for
holidays, to
Dubai for
shopping, to
the US for
work. They
only want to
go to Nigeria
for being
buried here. I
want to ask:
Is it a
cemetery?
10. Missing
Phone.
Akpos is
looking for
his phone in
the darkness.
He uses the
light of his
lost device.
Where is it? –
he asks. Then
a call comes.
Akpos
answers: I will
call you back
later, I’ve lost
my mobile!
After thinking
a bit, he tries
to dial his
number on
the phone in
his hands.
And… he
hears a busy
signal. Oh,
forget it! –
says Akpos, –
the phone
has been
stolen and
someone has
just cut my
call!
These funny
stories are
very popular
in Nigeria.
You can find
them and
many other
Nigerian
jokes and
comedyon
the Internet.
Enjoy reading
them and
share with
your mates
via social
networks or
during the
party.

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